[For Clarke] remember how it felt being in the sun

[to_survive]

Normally Bellamy didn't give a damn about comfort or propriety or anything else when it came to sex. On the Ark comfort was fleeting, and on the ground he'd indulged in his baser instincts when time allowed.

Now that he's free to do whatever he wants in Darrow, it's made sex a little more complicated. There's a completely different set of expectations between men and women here and he'd floundered his way through a few dates, trying to feel out those expectations. It was both frustrating and exhilarating, especially when he met someone he found he didn't mind spending too much time with, especially when Clarke had cut him out.

They're speaking again, but things are still a little delicate.

Jamie is anything but. She entertains Bellamy, her laugh and red hair brightening his apartment the short time she's in it. Having her around is nice, but he doesn't mind her saying she has to take off when he gets out of the shower, pants and t-shirt on even though his hair still drips water down his neck.

She also know show to keep from drawing things out, which Bellamy appreciates. She's collected her things and is out the door within minutes, saying she might call later.

He might even look forward to it.

Comments

[to_survive]

When Clarke moves toward him, Bellamy steps away, bumping into the counter behind him -- both as response to her movement and in surprise.

"Where the fuck is this coming from?" Bellamy voices his earlier thought, irritation quickly melting away. "And one woman does not mean I'm screwing my way through anything."

[willbetested]

Stepping back once she rolls her eyes in exasperation. Everything she's already said feels like a glaring admission of guilt and he should have picked up on that. The fact that he hasn't doesn't make it any less easy to be mad at him instead of properly dealing with it.

Wringing her hands, she's already starting to back out of the kitchen, making good on her declaration of leaving when the words come out in an angry rush. "Because I hate that it was her instead of me."

A second later she realizes what she said, eyes widening in horror as she covers her mouth as if that could take them back.

[to_survive]

Bellamy's mouth works but no sound comes out. He's gone completely blank for a moment as the impact of what Clarke has said hits him, and her behavior makes sense.

Despite her growing importance in his life, he'd never thought of her as just another girl to sleep with, nor did he think even if he wanted more that it would be reciprocated. Being friends and partners with Clarke had always been its own reward, and he steered clear of developing any feelings for her, especially with Finn around.

He knew he'd failed at that when he watched her walk away from Camp Jaha, but he kept whatever confused feelings he had hidden away here. She was the most important thing in his life, and the idea that she might even be a little jealous of him in some way that meant maybe she felt something?

He doesn't know what to say.

[willbetested]

Clarke can't believe it. It's one thing to feel the way she does, it's an entirely different matter admitting what she felt aloud. Her heart is pounding In her chest. All she wants is for him to say something.

Then again his lack of immediate reply is also a blessing. She doesn't know if she can stand to deal with a gentle let down right then. Everything is overwhelming enough as is.

That's why she manages to make herself move, doing the one thing that feels right: she flees, rushing out of the kitchen and his apartment. Being alone is the best thing right now.